An epidemic of addiction to pornography and compulsive sexual behavior is wiping out individuals, marriages and families! It has become clear that Latter-day Saints are not immune. Men, women and children of the LDS faith are finding, as Elder Neal A. Maxwell observed, that the chains of pornography do not easily let go of their victims. Fear, shame and humiliation prevent so many addicts from getting the help they need. Instead, they keep praying and reading their scriptures and hoping that Heavenly Father will just make this whole thing go away. In the meantime, years pass and the problem grows worse, not better. Despair is abundant; hope is scarce. "But this isn't how it has to be!" exclaims Andrew Pipanne, a Latter-day Saint and recovering sex and pornography addict. "Recovery from addiction is not only possible, but it's also a wonderful experience!" Sitting in a Rowboat Throwing Marbles at a Battleship is a collection of essays written by Andrew to help other LDS addicts, spouses, counselors and priesthood leaders understand exactly what is necessary for that recovery experience to take place.
Drawing on events from his own life, Andrew explains with rare insight how he and many other Mormons finally figured out what was keeping them from overcoming their "little porn problem." He presents a simple way of understanding what we're really dealing with in the now classic essay "The ABCs of Pornography Addiction." In "The Silent Seventy Percent," Andrew discusses why secrecy and isolation are suffocating so many Mormons as they desperately try to overcome their addiction on their own.
"A Letter to LDS Wives About Pornography Addiction" has also become a classic essay, helping thousands of Mormon women come to understand and accept that they didn't cause this problem in their husbands, they can't control it and they can't cure it. Through this book and the related LDS-focused recovery website, RowboatAndMarbles.org, these women are finding not only a greater understanding of the problem of pornography addiction, but they are also becoming empowered with the knowledge that they don't have to live with it and the insanity it causes in their families.
Sitting in a Rowboat... is full of hope but it is also full of reality, so it contains a lot of ideas that may be difficult for some Latter-day Saints (and others) to hear. "Addiction distorts our view of reality," explains Andrew. "Addiction causes us to twist and manipulate basic Gospel truths so that we eventually come to believe--falsely--that we really are following the Savior and that our compulsive sexual behavior including porn consumption is nothing more than a tiny bump in the road--no big deal." As one reader put it, "Sitting in a Rowboat... takes away the wiggle room that keeps so many Mormons in denial about their addiction and prevents them from getting the help they need."
In some of the most touching essays in the book, Andrew explains what recovery from addiction actually feels like and how that recovery changes the way we think, act and feel. "For years," says Andrew, "I kept telling myself that I was done with the porn--for real this time--only to fall back into it days, weeks or months later. It wasn't until I started working an honest recovery program with a sponsor, with other recovering addicts and with an effective 12 Step program that I finally starting feeling a genuine change in my heart and mind. I finally knew why I no longer acted out with my drug and I knew that I now had the tools I needed never to act out again!"
The message that Andrew shouts from the rooftops is that recovery from porn and sexual addiction is possible and wonderful!
