Pew! Pew! - Bite My Shiny Metal Pew!

Pew! Pew! - Bite My Shiny Metal Pew!

9 tales of galactic ludicrousness, all communicated entirely in beeps and squinks.

If you can read this, you're probably a cyborg.

Stealing Trouble - by Amy DuBoff

Legitimate business is boring. Thereâ€™s no thrill, just a lot of paperwork. The crew of the Little Princess II hates paperwork. To amuse themselves, they decide to try their hands at some old fashioned art theft and black market dealings. However, going in without a clear plan has a tendency to backfire. Old nemeses, incorrect assumptions, and bad luck are just the beginning of their problems.

Ivasion of the Kaviis - by C.C. Ekeke

Since childhood, Henar has trained to become part of the Kavii Benevolencyâ€™s grand military. But when heâ€™s sent to the backwater world known as Earth, his expectations of adventure and glory are all but destroyed. Still, the young soldier is hell-bent on making the best of his first military conquest. When Henar actually arrives on Earth, what he finds there opens his eyes to a new and unorthodox chance at glory... and unlimited belly rubs.

A Visit From my Cyborg Nana - by Zen DiPietro

Charlie Kenny is happy with his new life on the Second Chance. Heâ€™s been reluctant to return to Earth, but his nana needs help. The cyborg overlords that assimilated her now refuse to provide her with proper maintenance. Charlie has no choice but to face off against these robotic ruffians. Lucky for him, heâ€™ll have the help of Pinky and Greta, the two best friends a redshirt could have.

The Horrible Habits of Humans - by S.E. Anderson

Commander Strax of the Order would love nothing more than to command his ship and plan his retirement. Babysitting a new race is not part of the plan. When a simple dimplomatic mission goes sideways, itâ€™s up to strax to save the universeâ€”and keep the human out of trouble.

The Lone Ranger Returns - by Michael Anderle

Her grandfather is gone, his legacy remains. It takes a while for this granddaughter to realize you canâ€™t outrun the Grimes legacy.

Swarm of the Zom-Bees - by Chris J. Pike

Captain Jim Jones and his crew just want to enjoy a few space hot dogs when blood-sucking bees attack. After reaching a tentative truce, everyone has been fooled by the Space Bees, with their apparent need to cultivate honey everywhere: space honey sticks, space honey potsâ€”itâ€™s for sale in every port and every space station. But when the first Space Bee shop opens on Earth, Jones suspects something else is afoot as people start dropping like fliesâ€”LITERALLY.

Vermillion - by L.A. Johnson

Zenith researches ancient intergalactic maps for a living. Or at least she did, until she impulsively joined a slacker Civil Customer Service crew to get away from an ex-boyfriend who may or may not have burned down her apartment building. Now she must deal with the terrors lurking in deep space, a co-dependent ship named Vermillion, and a human-sized insect roommate. And when her past comes back to haunt her, her first job may be her last.

Gli+ches Wild - by Drew Avera

What happens when the unluckiest man on the planets plays a high-stakes game of poker against the richest man in West Virginia? He loses his ass in more ways than one. The real question is, what happens after?

Zap! Zap Boing! - by Andrew Lawston

The Starship Troupers Initiative is famed across the galaxy, bringing the greatest actors to entertain soldiers in warzones on the most lethal colony worlds. Now, new actor James Fanning must both give the performance of a lifetime, and singlehandedly turn the tide of Jargrothâ€™s civil war. The show must go on... even if it kills him!

Country	USA
Binding	Kindle Edition
Format	Kindle eBook
IsAdultProduct
Label	The Wooden Pen Press
Manufacturer	The Wooden Pen Press
NumberOfPages	531
PublicationDate	2017-11-09
Publisher	The Wooden Pen Press
ReleaseDate	2017-11-09
Studio	The Wooden Pen Press

Pew! Pew! - Bite My Shiny Metal Pew!

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